archives

oct/nov/dec 2017

11/21/17 Bring Cash, Pay The Dancers (by Dave Wheeler)  Dave and his friend's hit up a male strip club for a fun night out... only to have it fall flat. Just as they were going to throw in the towel, a special dancer came along and changed everything. Dave bares it all in the first guest post on Bare InkSlinger! NSFW Version Available

11/07/17 The Worst-Case-Scenario-er  When I found out that fixing my septum would be more than a "simple procedure," I panicked for all the wrong reasons.  But in my terrible thinking, I never predicted the one thing that actually went wrong.

10/24/17 Netwerrrk! 've been struggling to polish off my networking skills as a writer. Thus when I encountered one of the most famous people in my genre, I got totally freaked out about having to approach him. I sucked it up and faced my fear. But was the introduction a success or did I totally blow it?

10/10/17 Folsom: The Final Frontier When I went to Folsom Street Fair for the first time, I thought it might be my naughty final frontier. But the more I searched for this ultimate experience, the more I began to miss out on one of the best parts. NSFW Version Available

 

July/Aug/Sept 2017

9/26/17 Workplace Rejection When a friend recommended me for my prospective dream job, the final decision turned me into an emotional wreck. I struggled to cope in a healthy way, but eventually discovered that nothing is ever what it seems.

9/12/17 Friend Zoned for the Good When I found a sexy new friend, the friskier side of our friendship quickly got canned. The bastard had me more confused than ever. But we learned just how awesome getting "friend zoned" can actually be.

8/29/17 An AIDS Walk Asshole After this year's AIDS Walk had it's lowest turn out ever, I had some ideas on how to spice things up. But as the old adage says: "Actions speak louder than words." Except what if words are all you have left to give?

8/15/17 A Watched Clock Always Boils  When I took an adult education class, things quickly got dominated by one particular student. As the clock ran out, I began to lose my cool, and ended up taking it out on the wrong person. 

7/25/17 Ballin Like a Blogger Money is a weird thing and sometimes, as a blogger, it's easier to not discuss how we make an income. But in the tradition of baring it all, this week's essay explains the top ways bloggers earn their incomes and my own s̶i̶n̶i̶s̶t̶e̶r̶ sensible plans to do the same. NSFW Version Available

7/11/17 Ask and Ye Shall Achieve When I met one of my favorite musicians, I wanted more than just an autograph. But would she oblige to my request or turn me down? Afterwards I learned the real value of asking and what it truly entails.

 

Apr/May/Jun 2017

06/27/17 Giving the Right Amount of Fucks When I realized a guy at my gym didn't like me, I became a little too desperate to change his mind. In a culture where we boast about "no fucks given," it's hard to tell when we might accidentally be giving more fucks than ever.

06/13/2017 A Pulsating Need for Pride After having been a little too close to The Pulse Nightclub shooting, we suddenly got whisked away without any community to help us process the events. It was left up to us to find our peers and with it came a new sense of Pride... but also a realization about one of the gay communities bigger and stealthier threats. 

06/06/17 Chewing Appropriately to Achieve Your Dreams As someone who has a tendency to bite off more than he can chew, I'm starting to learn what I need to stop doing in order to start succeeding. But it won't be easy. What risks would you take in order to achieve your dreams? What sacrifices would you make?

05/30/17 InstaSwindled Trying to find an audience on Instagram has been an incredibly tricky process. In a desperate attempt to boost followers, I made a stupid mistake that lost me some dollars.  NSFW Version Available.

05/23/17 Insider on the Writer: Unpredictably Barfing Working in the arts can be fairly touch and go.  Even when we know exactly what we want to do, we can still get stuck.  So  do we try to predict the unpredictable or just adapt in the moment?

05/16/17 Lessons In Losing When losing a game, we have the opportunity to learn good sportsmanship. But what can you learn when you lose an entire human being? After the loss of a friend-of-a-friend, I discovered just how influential someone could be even if you technically weren't that close to them. 

05/08/17 Insider on the Writer: Making Time to Take Some Time It sometimes seems like needed rest may not be worth the added stress. But if we don't make time to take time for ourselves, we may end up running on fumes and burn out. 

05/01/17 Fear of the Neti Pot When I came down a cold, my partner convinced me to do something terrifying: use a neti pot.  With a less-than-desirable first round, I decided to give it a second chance on camera.  Video Available 

04/24/17 Apologizing Without Compromising A few weeks ago, I came to a crossroads when my blog fell into the wrong hands.  I needed to figure out where I made my mistake and how to make amends while still standing by work and writing. 

04/17/17 The Perks of Being Sex Positive During a recent argument, a friend said harsh things that flew in the face of sex positivity. In the wake of my frustrations, I discovered why such a perspective does me so good. NSFW Version Available

04/10/17 The Best Worst Vacation Ever Recently we took a last minute vacation to Las Vegas. But when one disastrous thing happened after another, I started to throw in the towel on having a good time. That is until I figured out the retreat's biggest spoiler. 

 

Jan/Feb/Mar 2017

03/29/17 Gold Star Be Gone Being a gold star gay was merely a fact: I’d never slept with a woman. But recently I met a couple who could change that. However I'd have to make the first move. Would I successfully lose my gold star or would I get rejected?

03/24/17 Insider on the Writer: Head Stuck In A Vice A mini-essay that explains why I didn't write the actual essay I had previously promised. Literally written on my phone from the passenger seat of my car during a road trip, it surprisingly didn't suck.  

03/17/17 Confronting Fear and Becoming A Badass When a reader asked how I have the courage to face fears, I had no choice but to turn it into it's own post.  It's not so much about how you do it, but rather how you think about it. 

3/08/17 Painted By Numbers When I got asked to pose for Tony Dortch, I was totally willing to strip down in order to get painted up. But what turned out more fascinating than his artistic vision was actually Tony himself. NSFW Version Available

03/02/17 Adventures In Adderall My bad brain rarely wants to cooperate with me. And since it’s starting to interfere with my ability to even hold a conversation, I decided the time had come to do what my mom thankfully didn’t: reach for the pills.

02/10/17 Dealing With The Dealers After getting in a totally stupid car accident, we decided to run over to the dealership to check out some options. But the whole thing became the cliche circus I had always heard about.

02/02/17 Inked With Integrity My fear held me back from more quality work. I didn’t want to make that mistake again. I gave up my emotional assurance and went back to higher-rated artists at the risk of rejection. NSFW Version Available

01/27/17 Are Safe Gyms A Setup For Failure? Safe gyms, like Planet Fitness, don't help folks reach their fitness goals. It merely helps them to defensively judge others so they don’t run the risk of being judged first. NSFW Version Available

01/19/17 PAP SMEARS: Not Just For The Ladies! When it comes to bodily testings, it seems that women get the short end of the stick. But sometimes the men also need to be searched on the inside to ensure a long and healthy life on the outside.

01/13/17 Forgetting to Do Unto Your Friends I felt a tad let down that my mother wasn’t engaging in my latest project.  Meanwhile, I had been doing the same thing to my friend over what could have been the last couple of years.

01/06/17 Reframing the Brain of 2016  I had reached my limit and wanted to usher 2016 right out the door. But thanks to my friend William, I realized that it was an incredible year.  Sometimes in the shadows of death, we forgot we lived. 

 

Oct/Nov/Dec 2016

12/29/16 Letting The Hater Hate Hater’s find the negative and automatically express it. I wanted to respond to his comments somehow. But creating a teachable moment for them wasn't the proper way to deal with it.

12/23/16  A Little Opiate Called Christmas I’ve always had a rebellious side and it has made me a bit of a scrooge about Christmas.  But now I was going to miss out on the thing I might have been needing the most. 

12/19/16  Posing Naked: The Good Kind of Awkward When someone asked if getting photographed while naked was awkward, the answer was “yes." But sometimes getting awkward actually gets really great. NSFW Version Available

12/16/16  CouchSurfing Like A Pro CouchSurfing recently went B-Corp and released a slick new app.  This has royally fucked things up.  Fortunately all it may take is a little education so that new users don’t look like total app-holes.

12/08/16 One Bad Card Makes The House Come Tumbling Down Life can feel like building a house of cards. But all it takes is one bad card to make it all come tumbling down.  If we can't purge the card, here is what we can do. NSFW Version Available

12/06/16  5 Reasons Why This Was The Best Halloween Costume of 2016 It wouldn’t have won a costume contest.  But it contained so much wit and originality that it will be burned into our minds for years to come.

12/01/16  World AIDS Day: The Need To Open Up About HIV Clearing the air can help stop that cycle of confusion, misinformation, mistrust, and hurt.  But airs cannot be cleared until conversations are willing to be had.

11/29/16  The Little Blogger That Could I have done everything in my power to properly protest the idea of writing a blog. Now I am actually doing it and it looks awesome and I can’t wait to do more.